Monday February 28 2011- Day 56

I'm back at work but I'm morbid and depressed. I know I hafta go through more of this chemo bs and I'm not looking forward to it. I call to try to pay the dr bill but cant get through to anyone. I call oncology finally and after sitting on hold forever am told that I cant have my usual Thurs appt that I will hafta come in on Wed for chemo at 12 noon. Ugh..not only am I off by a day but I hafta come in later which means being there later. I hate being there late. As it wraps up it gets quieter and quieter til the stillness and beeping is all you can hear. But they tell me there are no more days open with that 4 1/2 hour slot I need for my infusion. Ugh. I agree to the day and hang up. Crap..forgot about my shot. I call back and get a different nurse. She tells me I can come in at 8:30 am for my neulasta shot. Ok so I can come for the shot but not my transfusion on Thurs. Well the shot takes less than a min where infusion is hours. Blah..whatever. I get my shot scheduled and I email my job and give them the dates and times for this week of chemo. It means I'll only have a 2 day work week this week and a full week next week which sucks but oh well I guess. I text my dad and let him know. He's kinda blown too but we have no choice in this. We both are ready to get this all over with. My job doesnt complain they just have me make up a schedule for desk coverage and that's it. I do a good 30 min workout that day which I'm happy about. I love to feel normal on the few days that I get to feel them right now. Working out is 1 of those ways. Working out is a thing alot of people dread but I love it. I love how it makes me feel..energized and reinvigorated like I could take on anything at all even this cancer battle. Crazy right? I go home that evening and I'm tired so try as I might I dont stay awake long and fall asleep early.