Sunday, January 16, 2011- Day 13

I wake up this day in more pain than the last. I know I must find a way to get up off the bed and get to the bathroom as my stomach is in lurching pain as it has been all night long. I am constantly up during the night with nonstop diarrhea and I am constantly dehydrated. My cousin is coming over to bring food she has made for me. I am hoping that the fresh food will stay down better than anything I've made for myself but I am doubtful. I dont mention the diarrhea to anyone because it is not pleasant to talk about and I dont want anyone to know. I am exhausted from the lack of sleep and every step is painful as the pain is in my legs as well as back and arm. I sit in the bathroom trying to pull myself together. I go into my roommate's room and lay on the bed talking with him while he works on his computer. He has been so helpful these last few days when I cant get up off the bed. He helps me up and walks with me even. At night he covers me in blankets when I'm too frozen in pain to pull them over myself and shuts off my lights, tv and computer so I can sleep. I let him know my cousin is coming later so he is prepared. Meanwhile his sister comes over to visit. I am happy to see her even though I cant move from the bed to greet her. I know I look a mess..my hair is unbrushed and I havent gotten dressed in a few days because of the pain. My cousins arrive later to drop the food off and my roommate goes to help bring it in. I manage to get off the bed enough to greet them but I cant manage more than a weak smile for them. It hurts too much to stand up straight and immediately after they leave I crawl back in the bed with a bottle of water. I take more motrin pm and sleep off and on. I am sleeping upwards of 15-20 hours a day now but it's the only thing that keeps me from crying. I try to sound upbeat when my dad calls but I know he can hear the pain in my voice. I watch the playoffs a little but mostly keep myself drugged up so I can sleep as much as possible.